Haaay!

This is not my idea, but I am a strong proponent of it. This idea is that everyone who has ever had a birthday party, a house-warming party, wedding party, baby shower, or any party where gift giving is involved should have a registry. Everyone is familiar with the typical wedding registry where you get to pick out a plate or two or maybe some nice towels; or the baby shower registry where you can give the gift of cotton booties that will be used maybe twice. The benefit of these registries is that the person receiving the gifts gets exactly what they ask for and are happy to receive them.

Don't get me wrong, the 'surprise' gift at one of these events are usually nice and can be heart-felt, meaningful, blah blah. Often though, these 'outside' gifts are meaningful dust collectors, if not re-gifted to the next sap, er, recipient. People make a list of things because it is what they would most like to receive from the party-goers. It is also far easier for the giver to get something worth while without putting too much thought into it. Note: thought and care should be given for gifts for a significant other or even a family member, as the conditions are a bit different and the time and effort put into that gift are well appreciated. But for the rest of us, who are going to a friend's place or a more distant relative, a gift off a registry is just right.

This idea is not that hard to institute. Just make a list at your favorite store or two and let people know about it. The list maker must, however, take into consideration budgets and 'gift-worthiness', of course. This means having a range of price options, with a majority of those being on the lesser end so people will actually buy it. No one is going to buy you that surround sound system for your Labor Day cookout. Taking this into consideration, it should be fairly easy to come up with decent gift lists, especially at your large department/get-it-all stores like Target or Macy's.

Now, the trouble with this grand idea is getting past the social stigma associated with the word 'registry'. If I were to have a birthday party and I include on my invitations that I am registered at a certain place, there is an immediate reaction of snobbery or disdain, as registries are considered appropriate only for what they are known to be associated with: weddings and babies. I propose that for now the non-wedding/baby gift registry only be indicated as available by word of mouth, as in "Oh by the way, if you are having trouble with gift ideas, I went out and made a random gift registy at store X. Feel free to look at it if you need some ideas". You know, something off the cuff and relaxed that gets others thinking about how good an idea this and how they want one themselves, and not what a d-bag you are for making your own personal gift list.

If these personal gift registries can be looked upon as a good for all people socially, and not a stab at a person's self-importance than this can work. I think the underlying issue is that people like to give gifts that mean something to the recipient and often do not want them to be acutely aware of the cost involved. Registries put the dollar figures out in the open, allowing the recipient to draw a conclusion (whatever that may be) simply from that figure.

Still, for all the parties out there, it sure would be nice to know that the $10 wine holder is something the party thrower actually wanted. I'm sure the party thrower wouldn't mind either. Even better, is that if people actually got things they wanted for these run of the mill parties, there might be a lot more parties, and better ones at that. I can only imagine the party competition once personal gift registries are commonplace. But I won't get ahead of myself, just pass the idea along. The super parties will come...

Bloop-bloop...

I'm sure everyone has experienced some version of this: You're driving along, maybe 5, 10 or 15 mph over the speed limit, as is everyone beside you, when all of a sudden you see the familiar silhouette of a police car. Immediately, everyone slows back down to the speed limit. This slowing continues until A) the cop car is out of sight, B) you realize the cop has pulled someone over and won't be coming after you or C) you see someone ahead of you going just as fast, if not faster, so are wagering that they will be caught first. This is all fine and dandy, as I see speed limits as mere suggestions anyway. Nothing pisses me off more than cars actually going 55 on the highway while everyone else is doing about 70.

Well, the other day I had this police car experience and of course everyone very noticeably slowed down when the cop car merged onto the road from an on ramp. I thought to myself, "Great, it's slow going for the next few miles." I can deal with a mild inconvenience such as this, no problem. What inspired this post was my next thought. I realized that if you like traveling above a snail's pace when driving, it must absolutely blow to be a police officer. I must imagine that whenever an officer is driving around, he is constantly dealing with the slow-down reaction of the other drivers. This has got to be why police officers are always in a bad mood when they pull someone over.

Imagine every where you drive, everyone else is going at exactly what the speed limit is. Just by being on the road, you make every other car into speed limit robots that are afraid to pass or speed up. Granted, you are the authority figure, so the power you feel must account for something, but it must stink to know that your travels are going to take that much longer than if you were in a plain car.

What sucks is that this will never change. People will never risk getting a ticket when they see a police car on the road. They will wait until the threat is out of sight to go back to 'breaking' the law, as is the smart thing to do. It's the same with the speed traps that are common in places like DC. People see the speed cameras, slow down to the appropriate speed as they past by, then speed back up again once past them. Another analogy is to when you are being observed or evaluated on your job. You want to do the best/right thing while being watched, then once it is over, you can go back to the slackiness that every worker would rather do.

Getting back to my point, this thought makes me respect the police at least a little bit more, since it is just one more thing they have to deal with on a day to day basis. Sure, if they wanted to, they can just flip on their lights and zoom off as they please, but for the most part they are dealing with drivers they know are driving slow just because of their presence and must deal with it all day every day. I now know for sure that I could never cut it as a police officer, at least one that drives around on duty, as I would no doubt be screaming on the speakers at the slow drivers and ramming them with my brush guard out of sheer annoyance. However, if they gave me something like this picture, I could have a change of heart. I'd still be stuck driving slow though.

lol...

I'm a fan of free speech. I value the First amendment. I think it promotes ideas and understanding and an individual will benefit from it. However, one should always be responsible for what he or she is saying or expressing.

If you want to see a blatant misuse of free speech that hurts more than helps the idea of free expression, just visit any message board on the internet. It is remarkable what you will read on any given board anywhere on the net. Personal attacks, offensive language, racism, sexism, absurdity, stupidity, and misinformation (and of course plenty of spam) run rampant. It is quite ridiculous.

I feel that the reason this exists is that all of these posts and ideas are free from any type of culpability. Other than an IP address, there is no link to the person who is posting it, other than a created persona and maybe a crude avatar. This allows for the worst possible things to be said without any personal repercussion. Sure, the user may be kicked off the site, postings removed or edited and notices sent out of such behavior, but as of now there are no penalties or limits on what is expressed.

Don't misunderstand me, I am not saying there should be penalties or limits, but there should be a more concrete way of attaching the words to a person. The anonymity of postings allows for things that one would never say face to face to another person. It allows for the deeper feelings, be them right or wrong, to come out without worrying about what one's response to them will be. Often, these 'offensive' things posted are done so merely to get a reaction or response, much like the 'shock-jockery' of radio personalities or like provoking a fight that you don't have to be involved in. Sure, some of this is done merely for the potential humor of it, but most of it is just drivel that the electronic world would be better off without.

What is more unfortunate is that these posts are real thoughts and ideas of real people. What I mean is that these atrocious messages shatter the idea that most people are inherently good or well-meaning. What comes across instead is that our society and behaviors are merely a front for our true feelings and intentions and the individual hides them (and rightly so) for fear of other's response. On message boards, one can express those offensive remarks knowing that the fear that prevents him from saying it in public is not attached to it. Thus, we get the result of true free speech and all the unpleasantries that accompany it.

Yes, freedom of speech is a wonderful liberty. It allows us to be able to express our individuality in a world of plurality. Unfortunately, true free speech reveals far more into how individual we are and often compromises the social norms that allows us the comfort of being able to express ourselves. Again, we should not put a limit on expression, but we must realize that for anything we say or do, we will be held responsible for it in the public realm, and others may not appreciate your opinion. What happens as a result of that expression again falls upon the individual, but this should not be a blind circumstance. You should know whether or not the things you are saying might not be readily appreciated or accepted by certain other people. Ignorance is not an excuse. Our right to expression must be met with our need to be responsible for said expression, a balance that keeps the society of individuals functioning smoothly.

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On a side note, I am a fan of something I read on Wonkette.com. Every month or so, the editor posts that it is 'comment clean-up time' or something to that effect. Then, the readers vote on which usernames should be banned from the comments section because of their poor quality of responses. Granted, there are easy ways of getting around this, but I still think its a novel idea, especially with the amount of garbage available.